33 Problems You Go Through If You Love Makeup But Also Kinda Suck At It
Oh, how I wish I could beat my face like a REAL makeup blogger.
1. Applying your foundation confidently but realising you completely forgot about primer.
2. Watching hours and hours of makeup tutorials on YouTube, but your skills just never improve.
3. Being so proud of your smokey eye when you look in the mirror, but when you go outside you realise you look like a panda.
4. Not knowing how to feel when people tell you they love how you "don’t wear makeup", but in reality no one can see your full face because you suck.
5. Wondering how the fuck beauty bloggers blend their eyeshadow so perfectly.
6. Not even attempting to put fake eyelashes on, because you’ll either poke your eye with the tweezer and end up blind or completely miss your lash line and glue the falsies on your forehead or something.
7. Ignoring the existence of highlighter for so long because you didn’t ~get it~.
8. Although you kinda ~get it~ now, and even own MAC's Soft & Gentle, the concept of purple or blue highlighter still baffles you.
9. Never, ever, ever, ever being able to get your eyeliner even.
10. Wanting so badly to put on a full face for work, but knowing it will turn into a grease-fest by lunchtime.
11. Being matched to a different foundation shade by every makeup counter employee and leaving the store even more confused.
12. Not having Insta-worthy brows, and not being able to draw them on without it looking like you used a permanent marker.
13. Thinking you’ve kinda improved your skills when you’re beating your face, but when you look through photos from the night before you can hardly even see that contour you spent 20 minutes perfecting.
14. Spending 45 minutes attempting colourful eyeshadow and being SO STOKED at how it turned out... but when you go to apply mascara it splodges all up in your eyelid and ruins everything.
15. Not really knowing what to do with ALL the colours in an eyeshadow palette.
16. Then you end up with a useless palette which has two empty shades and all the rest intact.
17. Same goes for a contour palette. Why do you literally need six shades?
18. Doing a dramatic look but accidentally smudging eyeshadow dust under your eye and looking like you were punched in the face.
19. Trying to overline your lips like Kylie Jenner but instead looking like you’ve had an allergic reaction.
20. Attempting a nose contour, but it ending up looking like you’ve got a bruise.
21. Actually forgetting that you’ve put makeup on and then rubbing your eyes.
22. Accidentally using your summer foundation in winter and looking like an Oompa Loompa.
23. Watching a million tutorials on Instagram, but still being shook by how makeup bloggers make it look so easy.
24. Being legitimately terrified of using Anastasia Beverly Hills Dipbrow Pomade because it requires actual artistic skill.
25. Convincing yourself that if you just buy expensive products you'll be able to use them perfectly.
26. But then ending up spending hundreds of dollars on products that you only use once or twice.
27. Watching videos of "swatching" is not helpful at all because you need to see the product ON YOUR OWN FACE (not someone's arm) to decide if it's worth buying.
28. Going to a makeup counter for help is pointless for you, because you only understand about half the words they say.
29. Spending way too much time looking at infographics like "what eye shape are you" and "what type of eyebrows do you have" in an effort to pick the most flattering ~lewks~.
30. Finally nailing your look and getting a perfect contour on, but then someone remarking about how different you look and that it "doesn't suit you".
31. Or maybe they just didn't notice your efforts at all. Bitch, I spent two hours on this glitter liner! APPRECIATE IT.
32. Using three layers of foundation and two layers of concealer but STILL not being able to hide that pesky pimple on your chin.
33. But no matter what, you will keep trying because YOU JUST LOVE MAKEUP SO MUCH.