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    19 Tweets That Only Hot Mess Moms Will Laugh Out Loud At

    "A baby shower game requested everyone write parenting advice on a notecard, so I wrote down my favorite margarita recipe."

    1. This one's for the moms who are just trying to get from one day to the next:

    That awkward moment when your child looks to you for wisdom and you're like, "Honey, I don't even know what day of the week it is."

    2. The moms who aren't afraid of a little screen time:

    Me, to all my kids before the age of 2. "No screens allowed." On their 2nd birthday, handing over iPad. "This is your mother now."

    3. The moms who aren't Instaglam every second of the day:

    The best part of shopping at Target is the convenience. And that at least one mom always looks more frazzled than I do.

    4. The moms who've redefined the word romance:

    Me: Do that thing I like Husband: [takes the kids and leaves]

    5. The moms who hear their names a million times in a day and live to tell the tale:

    Mom Mom Mommy Mom Ma MOM MOMMY MOMMYMOMMYMOMMYMOMMYMOMMY MOMMMMMMMMMMY What are you eating? Xanax.

    6. The moms who just plain don't want to share:

    Son: Are you eating pie for breakfast? Me (eating pie): No. Fruit casserole. Want some? Son: NO. I hate casserole. Me (whispers): I know...

    7. The moms who make lemonade out of lemons:

    My 4yo just shut the bathroom door on me while I was inside and told me I was in jail. So I locked the door. I love this game.

    8. And the moms who add a little tequila to it:

    A baby shower game requested everyone write parenting advice on a notecard, so I wrote down my favorite margarita recipe.

    9. This one's for the moms who become more exhausted with each new kid:

    First kid: healthy, organic everything. After third kid: KFC chicken leg falls on floor - just pick it up and eat it, I don't care.

    10. The moms for whom the learning curve is real:

    I never knew you could do a job that you pretended to know what you were doing for longer than 3 years until I became a parent.

    11. The moms who try to stay sane while traveling with their kids:

    Asked to switch seats on the plane because I was sitting next to a crying baby. Apparently, that's not allowed if the baby is yours.

    12. The moms who run out of patience every once in a while:

    *Mary Poppins voice* Ok, children! Time to go! [15 min later] *Batman voice* I said let's go.

    13. The moms who have a little bit of "mom brain":

    I just grabbed a glass out of the cupboard, went to the sink and turned on the faucet. And then started to walk away without filling the glass. I’m responsible for raising children.

    14. And the moms who have a lot:

    Dropped my kids off at the dry cleaners and my shirts off at soccer. #RunningOnFumes #WingingIt #MomLife

    15. This one's for the moms who've become unlikely inventors:

    I’m inventing a swaddle blanket for like 5 year olds. It’s basically a straight jacket, but with a friendly name like “The Tantrum Hug.”

    16. The moms who aren't great at housekeeping:

    I'm busy clearing out clutter in my house today to make room for more dashed hopes and dreams.

    17. The moms who realize how naive they once were:

    8 yo: "Mommy, what did you want to be when you grew up?" Me: "Not this tired."

    18. The moms who may not make it on time, but at least they make it:

    Sorry I'm late, my son noticed his pupils were circles and he wants square ones.

    19. And the moms who realize the irony in this whole parenting thing:

    I feel like I’d be a much better parent if I didn’t have to do it every day.

    Well, no matter how perfect you are or aren't, you're killing it, moms, and don't you ever forget it!

    Fox

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