18 People Who Had Fleeting Moments Of Stupidity
"She thought north was whichever direction you were facing at the time."
Have you ever been talking to someone and they say something so stupid that you wonder if their brain shut off for a second?
Well, so have the good people of Reddit. Redditor u/bost724 asked, "What was your, 'This person is on another level of stupid,' moment?" and the AskReddit community came back with some absolute gems.
1. The failed insurance scammer:
"Dude burned down his convenience store for an insurance claim, and stopped the milk and bread deliveries the day before."
2. The security agent who may have flunked US geography:
"Going through security and the person says I need to show a different form of ID. I ask why because I gave them my driver’s license. They say I need a US document like a green card or something. I’m a US citizen. Then I realized... I explained how District of Columbia is long for DC. Like Washington DC. As in the capital of our country."
3. The person with a baffling question for twins:
"I’m an identical twin, and have been asked all manner of utterly ridiculous questions about it throughout my life. But I think the stupidest was when a girl once asked me, 'Do you ever get yourselves mixed up with each other?' I responded, 'Are you asking me if I ever sometimes think I’m my brother?' she replied, 'Yeah.'
No. I don’t."
4. The student who took the word "plant" very literally.
"Back when the Fukushima nuclear power plant disaster happened, we were discussing how the reactor had failed in a science class. Five minutes into the conversation, a girl piped up and said, 'I don't see what the big deal is. Why can't we just regrow it?'
She dead ass thought a nuclear power plant was...a plant."
5. The person who mistook national parks for zoos, I guess:
"I work for Parks Canada in Yoho National Park. I have been asked the question (seriously), 'Where do you keep the animals at night?' twice in my career. To this day, I still find great joy imagining what they thought was going on each night as we 'collected' every large animal in the parks."
6. The guy who ignored all signs:
"Watching a man try to open the locked front door of my shop while a bright red closed sign was literally inches from his face. He kept looking at the door like it was just stuck."
7. The person who was maybe thinking of scissors:
“'I can’t use this, I’m left handed.'
It was a fucking shovel and I was the idiot who thought a left-handed shovel existed."
8. The person who lived by her own compass:
"Knew a girl in middle school who thought north was whichever direction you were facing at the time."
9. The person who found a steal of a deal:
"This was my first experience in retail where I learned what many customers would be like.
Seasons were changing, so we put a lot of shirts we had to get rid of in the front and made them 50% off. I was working the register when a woman came up to buy her things. I rang her up and could see a look on her face like something was wrong. That’s when the following happened.
Lady: 'Why is this so much?'
Me: 'Pardon me?'
Lady: 'This should only be $10 not $20.'
I thought that maybe her item was on sale, so I asked if she could point out the sign because I wasn’t aware of it. It was a small store and we didn't have to walk anywhere.
Lady: 'This sign here.'
Me: 'This sign says that all shirts are 50% off.'
Lady: 'Yes, so why is this full price?'
Me: 'This is a hat.'
10. The person who was just being extra careful:
"I got a concussion a while back. A friend of mine told me not to come close because it might be contagious. They weren't kidding."
11. The person who wanted some of them dog genetics, please and thank you:
"I worked at a pet store in college. This customer asked me which food would make his pit bull 'swole.' I suggested a high protein food with a good amount of exercise but advised that a lot of it was determined by the dog’s genetics. He asked me if we sold genetics."
12. The person who loved mayonnaise, but NOT mayo:
"I once worked in a Midwestern grocery store deli and I was trying to explain to a woman that the name brand and generic brand of the macaroni salad that we carried were in fact identical. The woman yelled at me, saying she could only have the generic brand because 'one is made with mayo and the other is made with mayonnaise, and I don’t like mayo.' When I tried to explain that mayo is an abbreviation of mayonnaise, she just said 'I’m from the South, I know my food,' and tutted away."
13. The food critic:
"The time a friend told me how much he hates potatoes....while eating French fries."
14. The conservationist:
"Coworker bought a low-flow shower head. He filled the bathtub using the new low-flow shower head BECAUSE IT WOULD USE LESS WATER!"
15. The college-bound traveler:
"A few years ago my roommate was accepted to NYU and texted me a picture of the letter and said, 'Finally get to see a different country!'
We live in America."
16. The statistician:
"My classmate (in the last year of high school) was convinced that winning the lottery is 50% chance, because you either win it or not."
17. The person who couldn't believe her eyes:
"I was a cohostess with a girl in a restaurant, watching ads on a hanging TV for a new movie. At the end, it said 'coming soon to a theater near you,' at which she turned to me with wide eyes and genuinely asked, 'How do they know where I live?'"
18. And finally, the confused mom:
"Yesterday my mom said, 'It’s kinda weird how the Fourth of July has fallen on the same day of the year the past couple years.' I was dying and she was so confused."